Why does this insist to exist?
Why does is insist to cripple me up, and toss me on the floor,
Smashing me furiously into a hundred different pieces.
Tearing me up until I am nothing more than a fragment of once was me,
A shattered mirror,
Who only wishes to be whole once more.
Why does it insist to break me up from the inside,
And create this burning passion pain inside me?
Why must I love the one person I can never have,
Because this person in every way is one of those I hold dearest?
The fear overshadows the joy,
and when the joy overtakes the fear,
it is only for seconds.
The pain is immense.
It is undeniable.
It is after years of torture, my only truth.
It is was now is me,
It is what now defines me.
But it is not what I wish to be.
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